Ah, the “f*ck boy” a less than charming basic bro who wants to hookup and that’s about it, with the classic line of “you up?” at 1-ish a.m. They’re an allusive mix of mediocre attributes and sex appeal, usually with the depth of a mud puddle with equal amounts of charm.
So why, dear god, do we fall into their sloppily planted traps of shitty texts and sub-par pickup lines? I’ll tell you why; we’re bored AF (also sometimes drunk- both, let’s say both).
The only real reason we pay these idiots any mind is because we have the time to. Sure, we may crush on the idea of them (emphasis on idea) for a short amount of time. That’s the best part of any sort of romantic (used loosely) endeavor.
The idea of something or someone is always sexier than the reality because we can make it basically whatever we want it (or them) to be. That’s the fun part. The part that gets feelings hurt is when the reality hits like a ton of bricks. This is why it’s important to be as upfront with each other before hopping in the sheets as to what the expectations are in this encounter for both parties. Not to say people don’t or won’t lie, but it’s worth a shot.
It isn’t that every girl wants a relationship with every dude she meets. In fact, for me, it’s the opposite. I want to get to know someone and am usually extremely skeptical of people in the beginning.
What’s annoying about “f*ck boys” is that they don’t bother with that part- or care to for that matter. They get as close to you as needed to get into bed, then disappear for good, or until the next time they want to hop back in the sheets. Now if you’re okay with that arrangement, more power to you.
However, in my experience, this is confusing and annoying to girls, because it’s not that we want to marry you bro, it’s that we want to know in some capacity, that we “know” the person we just slept with. Hey, who knows, maybe a friendship could come out of it.
We can be honest about the future and what we both want, but give us the opportunity to be heard and we’ll listen. Don’t just think you can enter our beds and our bodies with a simple two-word text over and over. Yes bro, I’m up. My doors locked and I’m with someone else who actually speaks words and doesn’t high-five people to say hello.
Getting over a fuck boy is simple. Get busy. I don’t’ mean with sex, which is probs what got you into this situation in the first place- I mean get busy with activities, work, and other people. Expand your circle, start a new project, get passionate about something else.
You’re looking for an outlet to shed love on or get passion from, so find that in something else. You’re not heartbroken, you’re bored and spending time and energy on this idiot because you have the time and energy to spend. Treat that precious T&E like money, and use it on something that makes you light up (new hobby), or look amazing (new exercise classes, etc.) and shake off this bump in the road. Because that’s what it is, a semi-good looking annoying pothole that right now you keep tripping on, but in reality, you just have to turn your wheel, hit the gas and power the fuck by it. #boybye